I recently wrote about listening, really listening.  In conquering that difficult skill myself, I was amazed at how much I was missing, how much I was really not “getting”, and especially about people I thought I knew well.

With the know-it-all judgemental filter off, not only did I get to discover some wonderfully quirky aspects of friends and co-workers, I learned new ways of having fun, new reasons to laugh and new ways to care.

Listening and staying in the moment, I discovered a new game: catching them in the act of doing something great. Imagine catching someone doing something right.  Imagine that instead of looking for failings and playing the blame game, you actively look for something wonderful.

Just as pointing the finger, head shaking in disapproval brings feelings of disappointment, frustration and perhaps even guilt, when you catch someone doing something right, there can only be a warm feeling of … bubbly giggles.

It’s a great game.  On my good days, when I remember to play the game, the morning school run is full of good “catches”.  Those are the days when the customary kiss before getting out of the car is really heartfelt.  Those are the days I sing all the way to the office.

Catching people around you doing something right is easily the fastest way I know to go from so-so to soaring, from “meh” to “yay!”.   The surprise element makes it even sweeter, because we all expect all kinds of things, but we almost never expect someone to notice that we did something right.  And we certainly never expect them to actually take the time to tell us.

Be prepared for the suspicious looks though.  Your newly caught criminals will look to see if you have some hidden agenda somewhere.  But as they figure out you’re playing this wonderful new game, where there are only winners, you will see the suspicions slowly, but steadily, melt away.

Remember to play the game, and catch someone in the act.  Don’t forget to tell them.  Then sit back and do your thing.  Who knows, someone might catch you in the act.